Let’s talk “doin’ your business on the road”…. washrooms!!

Sometimes it’s difficult to find a decent washroom with a sink and running water, especially on the east coast, and with the pandemic, many states/provinces had closed rest areas for us truckers so it was even more difficult!! Adding to that, new procedures at customers which some of them have kicked us out of the use of their washroom facilities. We can pickup and deliver their goods, and they may take 4hrs to load/unload us, but no, we cannot use their washrooms. Nice…..

Thankfully tho some companies have put out porta potty’s aka “Johnny on the spots” for us to use, but no running water to wash our hands and sometimes no hand sanitizers either. And most Johnny’s are nasty as hell and you don’t want to touch anything, even with gloves on, and you NEVER wanna sit on the seat (clean or not). Some are very clean tho thankfully.

But what if you have an EPS (emergency poo situation)??!! You hold it, and you train your body to not release ‘unexpectantly’, and you watch what you eat, calculate your time as to when you know you will be near a washroom facility (just like you have to calculate for when you need to pee). I’m sorry but there isn’t enough toilet paper in the world that I could lay out on the toilet seat in a Johnny and feel comfortable sitting down (it’s squatting room only). Then there is the blue chemical liquid inside the toilet…if you drop a ‘biscuit’ or two, you know that liquid is coming up and splashing your lady/man parts. Suddenly you’re in a bidet. Uhhh no thank you, that’s one chemical romance I do not support.

Now, for your rituals of waking up, like brushing your fangs and your hair, washing your face with running water, putting on creams, maybe cleaning your armpits, etc. Imagine sharing the washroom with 2, 3, 10 or maybe a tour bus load of people first thing in the morning (which is just as annoying at night/bedtime as well). You have to fight to get a toilet, then fight to get to a sink and claim your space, with the people staring at you like you are an alien or something cuz you are doing your business.

Well now with the whole pandemic, you can’t just walk into a truckstop or service area washroom to wash your face or brush your fangs cuz you have to wear a mask, so either come up with another solution that you can do in the truck or wait until shower day (for washing your face with running water I mean, god that would be some nasty breath lol). This is one thing I realise I took for granted, the freedom to have running water to wash with.

Showers and getting to one is a challenge as well. You have to find parking, calculate the stop into your route if possible, work out the timing, etc. One day I had done all that and arrived at the truckstop but there was no immediate parking. I had to park down the street on the side of an on ramp and walk back half a mile to the truckstop at 3am to have a shower. I just couldn’t skip it.

Some shower rooms are so dirty and probably haven’t been cleaned in days… so, do you try to carefully get cleaned up with minimal touching of surfaces, or do you wait another possibly 2 days to find the time and hopefully a clean shower facility…? And with the pandemic, do you really want to chance it in the dirty washroom?! But then a clean looking washroom could also be a risk, you never know. I came across a tiny shower room once that didn’t have a toilet, just a sink and shower stall, european style. I’ve also come across really clean shower rooms, and big too, you could easily do yoga in there and the floors are clean enough to do so lol.

So, moral of the story is when you can just get up and easily walk to a washroom whenever you want, to use the toilet, or have a shower, to wash your face, pop a pimple, whatever…. be grateful. I know I am when I get home and can enjoy it without having to do a balancing act, trying not touch anything while doin’ my business.

One good thing with the Johnny on the spots tho… it is a good workout for your legs holding a half squat for 30 to 60 seconds….